Numbers

The fact is, I'm turning 35 this year. I was so happy to get to 30. It was as if I was finally sprinkled with a decent dose of crediblity and oddly comforting - like pulling on a favorite sweater and having the perfect occasion to wear it. Turning 35 has been looming over me since a month before I hit 34. Why? What's the significance of 35? Aside from the obvious that it is closer to 40, I have a inescapable habit of comparing myself to my mother who died at 55. So 35 then, gives me 20 years. Now I realize that I could be hit by a bus tomorrow and that there is no guarantee that I'll get 20, and yes, there is of course the possibility that I could live well beyond that too. But it is what it is. My brain focuses on 55 and the hourglass getting me there.

Turning 25 was no earth shaker. My daughter was born a few days prior, and aside from hoping that we wouldn't share a birthday (and yes, that I'd get to see Harry Potter in theaters), I didn't have the same kind of "30 years left" feeling - my mom died when I was 26.

More important numbers greet me on my bathroom scale. Fortunately, they haven't been so harsh to me lately, but I attribute that entirely to nursing my son and give no credit whatsoever to positive habit formation or strong willpower. Sadly the opposite is my trepidation - now that he's weaning, those beers and snacks have got to go.

And again, here we are at the bike. : ) Is the bike going to solve everything? I'm sure there are people out there who would confidently say "YES!" I admit that right out of the gate I know I need more than that.

My work has organized it's own version of The Biggest Loser, and after signing up I have been added to a team with three other ladies competing against three other teams. In addition to supporting each other, we've put in a small little pot-o-cash for the winner, and have signed ourselves up for the Pound for Pound Challenge to support our local food bank. If there is one thing I know about myself, it is that I ALWAYS do better when I am with or commit to other people. I hope this helps, and that while I do come back to the numbers, I hope I get to celebrate the successes of some friends too.